Birmingham AL Collaborative Divorce Law Blog

Monday, July 16, 2018

Don’t Let Divorce Overwhelm You: Four Ways to Find Relief

Divorce at any time in life is difficult. Splitting up comes with complications and anxieties. Even if you initiated the divorce and feel ending your marriage is “for the best” where everyone is concerned, starting over may be intimidating — or even downright scary. But you can learn a lot from those who have been there, done that, and come out on the other side of divorce.

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Monday, July 2, 2018

Not Guilty: Four Ways End the Self-Blame Game

Shoulda. Woulda. Coulda. These are three phrases that can haunt us for decades after any decision, great or small. For many people who divorce, feelings of regret and guilt can be overwhelming.
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Monday, June 25, 2018

How to Consider Your Divorce a Success

Here’s a radical thought: Just because your marriage failed doesn’t mean it was a failure. Reframing the way you think about your divorce, can be a game-changer. First, however, experts say you may have to rethink how you think about marriage.

“Your marriage has one goal," says, Hal Runkel, licensed marriage and family therapist, and registered conflict mediator in Atlanta, GA. “Marriage has evolved into a people-growing machine.”

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Monday, June 18, 2018

How to Heal After Divorce, No Passport Required

If you're looking for a summer read, one of the best post-divorce books is Eat. Pray. Love. a work of non-fiction by Elizabeth Gilbert. The story is based on her personal experiences and how she recovered from a painful divorce, embarked on a spiritual journey, and reclaimed her life. (Spoiler alert: Gilbert finds happiness.) Along the way she also discovers a lot about herself and what it means to open up to the possibilities of life after going through a painful split.

Most of us can't jet away for a year-long spiritual sabbatical, but if you're divorced or divorcing, you can use Gilbert’s approach to help get through the difficult times — without crossing a time zone.

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Monday, June 11, 2018

If It Ain’t Broke, Fix It Now: Four Divorce Insights For Happy Couples

When a couple is getting along (or if they’re ignoring problems) it’s easy to set aside important aspects of the marital partnership. Divorce proceedings illuminate a host of practical issues that — while the couple was married — may have been left unattended. Too often, by the time couples end up in their divorce attorney’s office, it’s too late to save the relationship. And yet, there’s a lot of wisdom to be gleaned when going through the process of divorce.

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Sunday, June 3, 2018

Baby Boomers Drive Divorce Trend

Move over Gen X’ers and Millennials, the Greatest Generation has outdone you again. According to a recent survey by the Pew Research Center, a nonpartisan fact tank,  at a time when divorce is becoming less common for younger adults, the divorce rate has roughly doubled  among U.S. adults ages 50 and older over the past 25 years.

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Tuesday, May 29, 2018

Divorce & Children: How Toxic Relationships Cause Harm

Sitting in her therapist’s office, Birmingham mom Janet* choked back a sob, “I am so unhappy in my marriage, but I don’t want to hurt our children!” Janet’s therapist smiled compassionately, took a deep breath and uttered the words that Janet would carry with her through her divorce and beyond: “Leaving a relationship that’s causing you this much emotional anguish is not going to hurt your kids.”

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Monday, May 21, 2018

Can You Take a Vacation from Divorce?

With summer almost here, divorced couples with children will once again be doing the shared custody dance. As the established school schedule melts away quicker than an Eskimo Pie in Alabama, suddenly you’re faced with juggling vacations, camps, team practices, trips to grandmas and more. For divorced parents, summer can feel like like anything but a vacation.

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Monday, May 14, 2018

Five Reasons Why Divorce is Difficult and How to Get Through the Tough Times

There is no denying that going through a divorce is one of the most difficult and stressful events you can encounter. The process can be draining emotionally, physically, spiritually and financially. Facing the challenges head-on will not make it easier, but it can help you prepare for turbulent moments and provide some resolve as you weather the storm.

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Monday, May 7, 2018

Good Grief: Five Steps for Acknowledging Loss

You longed for the day when your divorce would be final. Now that day has come, but you don’t feel like celebrating. Even when it is the healthiest resolution for all parties involved, divesting a relationship and all that entails will likely stir feelings of loss. Although it may be difficult, grief can be an important part of the healing process, says Dr. Karen Finn, life and divorce coach and author of On the Road from Heartbreak to Happiness.

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Monday, April 30, 2018

What Can You Learn From Divorce?

Just because your marriage didn’t “work out” doesn’t mean it’s been a total loss. Quite the contrary. It’s natural to have feelings of regret, shame, and sadness when your dream of a life together ends abruptly, but once you get beyond those initial feelings, divorce (like any adverse event) can become your greatest teacher.

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